i m sorry for being born in this world

Chapter 8. Power and Personality

Sector 1 of the shelter, where the battle had previously occurred.

The soldier who had his head smashed in only had his lower jaw still intact.

His red tongue that had become completely exposed to the outside was dangling powerlessly on the ground.

Whoosh.

Wind came in through the open doors of the room.

The tongue that the wind touched began to move slightly.

At the same time, the destroyed brain matter on the floor began to tremble.

The eyeballs popped out of their sockets, and rolled on the floor.

Not long after this happened, a black matter above the corpses began to form a whirlpool of sorts.

A skeleton was formed first.

The brain and the intestine took its place, and blood veins began growing like tree roots.

Nerves reconnected, and the joints and muscles of the body stuck together.

The flesh from the dead bodies in the area was reconstructing an entire human body.

[Immediate Revival = Overdeath].

It was an ability that allowed its user to revive using the corpses in a 100km vicinity.

"God damn~ I ruined my style."

Necro, who had recovered his appearance before his death, cracked his neck.

"Is he a modified human or what? How did he manage to do all that without any mana..? Dear me."

Who would've expected something like this?

The murderer had pierced through Necro's head with just a 'fingernail'.

This wasn't something that was possible, if one took into account the strength of humans and the strength it would take to achieve such a feat.

"Things would've gone crazy if he got summoned just five years earlier."

Necro recalled the time when the murderer killed the children.

The man was already dead, couldn't feel anything, and was riddled with status effects, and yet…

He still managed to easily kill level two ability users with a smile on his face.

"Monsters really are monsters, huh."

He understood now.

He understood the vicious void within that smile.

If one were to be more accurate, it wasn't even a smile.

"It" just imitated a human.

That creature was just something that resembled a human.

If it was in the past, he never would've realized it.

After all, back then, Necro was just a man smarter than the average person.

If he hadn't awoken to his power…

"Ah. Hah- dear me. I should really stop thinking about stupid things. Oh my, so cold! I should go get some clothes. How embarrassing is this? I look like a total pervert."

Necro shivered as he took off clothes from the corpse that used to previously be him.

*

Was I dead?

A stupid question.

I couldn't make sense of my current state, as I was already dead.

My body's status is…

I was a little relieved after seeing my status screen.

5 health left.

Looks like the girl decided to let me live.

I modified the floating eye to check my current situation.

…Not good.

My body was wrapped with bandages, and my arms were restrained with a straightjacket.

"Hup!"

The straightjacket didn't break even when I tried.

Must be special-made.

I gave up on escaping quickly, and took a look around.

A relatively large place made out of gray concrete.

On one corner of this place was a wooden table, and two sofas facing each other.

I found a familiar face there, and widened my eyes in surprise.

"Hey! You're awake, then?"

"…Necro Kill?"

He should've been dead, though?

"What a nice face. You thought I was dead, didn't you? Correcto! Of course I died. How would I stay alive after having my brains blown out?"

Necro tapped on his forehead several times.

"Thanks to that, I was really confused even after I revived, you know? How I died, and why I died. I didn't get that no matter how much I thought?"

Necro stood up from his sofa, and walked over to my immobile body.

"Why'd you go and do that? I thought we had a pretty good thing going on between us? Did you dislike the floating eye that much?"

I think I understood now.

So this was the man's ability.

I don't know the specifics, but it probably allows him to revive. Under special conditions, at least.

"Why aren't you answering? I thought I gave you the ability to talk?"

Necro squatted down next to my head, and put his hands on my shoulder.

His mana began to flow.

The bandages around my body began to emit a holy light that enveloped me comfortably.

A normal person would've been comforted by this light, but.

"….Geh, hyak! Hack!"

As my nerves revived, the horrid feeling of life swept towards me.

The pain that I felt was akin to having my skin burned, my intestines cracked, and my bones turn to dust–

I couldn't breath.

"How is it? Does it hurt? It hurts a lot, doesn't it? Yeah~ it probably does. See, as long as I pour in some mana, I'd be able to activate the white magic that heals people stored in these bandages."

Necro pushed down my shoulder as he continuously injected mana.

"Since these bandages are restoring a dead person's nerves, it allows you to feel pain."

I could smell rot, and taste some filth in my mouth. My blurry eyes got filled with light, and blinked out again like a broken fuse.

"Oh! Ohaha! Yah~ you seem to be in a lot of pain. Don't the burns on your body make you feel like you're burning to death right now?"

My back soared upwards into the air, daring to break itself in half.

"Since your lungs aren't normal, either, you must be suffocating as well? The pain of not being able to breath! Oh, and haven't your smell revived as well? The odor of death is quite something, isn't it? Ah, but the true icing on the cake must be your tongue. Enjoy the taste of your rotting tongue."

About three minutes.

"Well~ let's stop here."

The light faded as Necro stopped injecting mana into the bandages.

Necro tapped my shoulder lightly, and stood up with a smile.

At the same time, the restraints on my arm were taken off.

"Let's call it even, yeah? No hard feelings. After all, you killed me too, didn't you? Doesn't this put us on even grounds? Let's just… forget about the past! Start anew, you know what I mean?"

I suppose I had no choice in this matter.

"…Fine."

"Phew~ I'm glad you accepted. Right, a good person should be at least this generous. See, I was planning on torturing you untill you said yes."

Necro grinned.

"We're cool now, yeah? I don't think we can quite become BFFs at this point, but I suppose we can be friends who killed each other at one point. Ah! I'm talking too much. I forgot to introduce someone to you."

Necro tyurned around, and clapped twice.

"Oi! We're done here! You can come back in!"

As soon as Necro said this, a thick, metal door opened itself.

"Excuse me!"

The one who came in with a bright smile was the saint.

"The famed white magician, Morto Hai, is now here!"

That strange pose is… was she practicing?

"Are you alright now, Mr. Murderer?"

The saint walked closer with a smile on her face.

Morto Hai.

'Life and Death', in Latin and Hebrew.

"Mm? Your eyes are healed?"

The saint said this as she looked over my face.

Her face resembled that of a squirrel searching for food.

"You can see well now, right? As I thought, Full Bloom really does work well?"

…So it was this idiot's item?

"Hey, I'll be leaving the rest to you?"

Necro straightened out his clothes as he said this near the exit.

"Tell him about his power first. Tell him the dangers and the advantages of using it. Ah! Tell him about your power as well. Don't get eaten up like last time again."

"Pfft! You worry too much."

"In any case, take care of yourself, alright? I'll be going, then? If something happens, just contact me."

"Bye bye~"

"Sure, sure~"

The two seemed to share a relationship like an uncle and his niece.

Once Necro went outside, the saint bowed down directly above my head.

Her long hair almost threatened to tickle my nose.

"Alright then, Mr. ero ero Murderer. There's just two of us now."

She must be able to see my name using Oracle, and yet she still calls me Mr. Murderer…

Plus, that 'ero ero' prefix gets on my mind as well.

"Mn? Why aren't you saying anything? Hah! Could it be…"

The saint hugged her scanty breasts with her arms.

"I may be a beautiful girl, but please don't think perverted thoughts about me! I'll sue you!"

Beautiful girl, eh…

"Not interested."

The saint, after hearing this, covered her mouth with a gasp.

"C-could it be… Y-you… N… Necro…"

The saint balled up her fists, as if she had become deeply offended by something.

Her cheeks flushed red as she tried to say something.

A personality that would match up quite well with this person would be a funny, light-hearted one.

I thought of the type of person I'd have to act out in the future, and instead of replying to the saint's nonsense, stood up.

"I thought this the first time I saw you, but you really are quite small."

I could see a tiny head right below me.

"I wonder if I can throw you away as recyclable trash if I crush you like this?"

"Um… your inner thoughts are spilling out, it seems?"

"I said it so that you could hear it."

The saint grasped her chest with mock pain on her face.

"You were going to tell me about me power, right? Let's go seat there."

My body's condition had improved.

Even though it had hurt, the Full Bloom item's effect was to heal. The torture that Necro imposed on my body actually healed me.

"This is pretty nice, isn't it."

The saint sat down on the opposite side of me with a grin as she kept spouting nonsense.

Just what was she so happy about?

Everyone I've met so far had expressed disgust towards me.

"Stop saying nonsense, just tell me what I need to know."

"Yes, yes~ but before that."

Her voice sank.

"Can we talk about the people you've killed, Mr. Murderer?"

The saint calmly continued speaking.

"It's been six hours since you've come to this world. You've killed eight, and attempted to kill two."

The murder attempt was on Necro and the saint.

"I can't help but ask you, just what do you think of human life?"

Doesn't really matter if it's worth anything or not, does it.

"It couldn't be helped. I was commanded to kill innocents, after all."

"What about the guards, then? Did they deserve to die?"

"Of course they did. They shot their guns at me. If they began shooting, it must've meant that they were ready to face death."

"You went overboard, Mr. Murderer. With your skills, you should've had enough power to take care of all these people without killing them."

"Well, is there a reason to leave people alive, thereby putting your own life at risk?"

"If you just… regarded human life as something more precious…"

Boring.

Instead of saying my thoughts out loud, I lied faithfully.

"I'll try to do that in the future."

The saint sighed.

"…Fine, we'll end it here."

She closed her eyes, then opened them again after a short moment of thought.

"We're both busy people, you and I, so we'll start immediately. First, let's talk about the existence of power."

The saint reached for a flower pot on the table.

"Everything has a 'beginning', and every existence has a 'reason'. All living things have a Personality. There are those who wish to live, those who wish to simply survive, or those who  wish to help others."

Blue lightning arced across the saint's forehead, and created a crown of light on her head.

"The reason of existence, psychology, rules, goals… If those are what makes up your Personality,"

When the saint touched the wilted flowers, it slowly began to come back to life.

It's petals were restored, and its stalks became full of life again.

"Once your soul evolves to turn your personality into something tangible, a power is created."

A window appeared in front of me.

[Salvation = Love & Peace]

– Takes on the pain and injuries of others for yourself.

– [Lv. 1] Take on the pain and injuries of others for yourself.

– [Lv. 2] Take on the poisons and diseases of others for yourself.

– [Lv. 3] Take on the misfortunes and curses of others for yourself.

– [Lv. 4] Take on the age of others for yourself.

– [Lv. 5] Take on the death of others for yourself.

– [Lv. 6] Take on the sins of others for yourself.

"So in other words, you just slave away for other people."

"What did you say?"

The saint balled up her left hand with a kind smile.

"Nothing."

Her hands trembled as she cleared her throat.

"Let's continue. power is something that the soul creates to materialize your Personality. It's often confused with psychic powers, but psychic powers only make use of the strength of your soul. Any wizard can use it. Like this."

The saint extended her hand.

A small stream of light came out of it, and wrapped itself lightly around the flower pot.

The flower pot was then lifted up to my eye level.

If I couldn't see mana, it would've looked like the flower pot lifted by itself.

The saint put down the flower pot back onto the ground.

"Tada~!"

"……"

"Hoho~ you're a shy one, huh? But I get it. I understand your feminine shyness!"

"Shut up."

The saint just stood there dumbly in shock for a second, then grasped her chest with a loud "kuh!" once again.

"H-hnngh! That attack just now hurt quite a bit!"

The saint looked at me with a breathless face.

"Just finish explaining. So in short, power has a 'uniqueness' about it unlike psychic powers?"

"…Kuh! Correct. Each person gets one power. There are no same powers in the world, either."

"It looked like other summoned people could use their power?"

"Yes. All can use it. Ah! Of course, in this world, there are people who worked for a long time to awaken their powers. About one in a million, I think?"

The explanation just kept getting more and more ridiculous.

"Are you an idiot?"

The saint seemed to be a little confused.

[Love & Peace].

This ridiculous ability forces its user to sacrifice her life force for others.

I don't know the conditions to get it to level up, but the fact that it is level six would mean that she used it quite a bit.

Enough to earn her the title of the saint–

This idiot thought that saving other people was a normal thing to do, and must've 'saved' a countless number of people in the process.

How stupid.

To think that she'd work so hard for something as worthless as 'other people'.

"Idiot saint."

"My patience bank is about to file for bankruptcy, you know?"

The saint's peaceful face began to crack a little.

"I'll say this here and now. I am not an idiot. I am Morto Hai. Call me by that name."

The saint said this with a kind smile, and added one more thing with a glare.

"Idiot murderer."

Grrr.

Raaawr.

A predator.

This idiot was a polar opposite of me.

I couldn't accept it. I couldn't take it. I could only deny it.

Such a worldview was wrong.

The one thing that is worth the most in this world is yourself.

No one else matters more than you yourself.

If you deny this fact,

If you slowly chip away at your life due to altruism,

You might be able to save everyone, but not be able to save yourself in the end.

Chapter 8. Power and Personality

Sector 1 of the shelter, where the battle had previously occurred.

The soldier who had his head smashed in only had his lower jaw still intact.

His red tongue that had become completely exposed to the outside was dangling powerlessly on the ground.

Whoosh.

Wind came in through the open doors of the room.

The tongue that the wind touched began to move slightly.

At the same time, the destroyed brain matter on the floor began to tremble.

The eyeballs popped out of their sockets, and rolled on the floor.

Not long after this happened, a black matter above the corpses began to form a whirlpool of sorts.

A skeleton was formed first.

The brain and the intestine took its place, and blood veins began growing like tree roots.

Nerves reconnected, and the joints and muscles of the body stuck together.

The flesh from the dead bodies in the area was reconstructing an entire human body.

[Immediate Revival = Overdeath].

It was an ability that allowed its user to revive using the corpses in a 100km vicinity.

"God damn~ I ruined my style."

Necro, who had recovered his appearance before his death, cracked his neck.

"Is he a modified human or what? How did he manage to do all that without any mana..? Dear me."

Who would've expected something like this?

The murderer had pierced through Necro's head with just a 'fingernail'.

This wasn't something that was possible, if one took into account the strength of humans and the strength it would take to achieve such a feat.

"Things would've gone crazy if he got summoned just five years earlier."

Necro recalled the time when the murderer killed the children.

The man was already dead, couldn't feel anything, and was riddled with status effects, and yet…

He still managed to easily kill level two ability users with a smile on his face.

"Monsters really are monsters, huh."

He understood now.

He understood the vicious void within that smile.

If one were to be more accurate, it wasn't even a smile.

"It" just imitated a human.

That creature was just something that resembled a human.

If it was in the past, he never would've realized it.

After all, back then, Necro was just a man smarter than the average person.

If he hadn't awoken to his power…

"Ah. Hah- dear me. I should really stop thinking about stupid things. Oh my, so cold! I should go get some clothes. How embarrassing is this? I look like a total pervert."

Necro shivered as he took off clothes from the corpse that used to previously be him.

*

Was I dead?

A stupid question.

I couldn't make sense of my current state, as I was already dead.

My body's status is…

I was a little relieved after seeing my status screen.

5 health left.

Looks like the girl decided to let me live.

I modified the floating eye to check my current situation.

…Not good.

My body was wrapped with bandages, and my arms were restrained with a straightjacket.

"Hup!"

The straightjacket didn't break even when I tried.

Must be special-made.

I gave up on escaping quickly, and took a look around.

A relatively large place made out of gray concrete.

On one corner of this place was a wooden table, and two sofas facing each other.

I found a familiar face there, and widened my eyes in surprise.

"Hey! You're awake, then?"

"…Necro Kill?"

He should've been dead, though?

"What a nice face. You thought I was dead, didn't you? Correcto! Of course I died. How would I stay alive after having my brains blown out?"

Necro tapped on his forehead several times.

"Thanks to that, I was really confused even after I revived, you know? How I died, and why I died. I didn't get that no matter how much I thought?"

Necro stood up from his sofa, and walked over to my immobile body.

"Why'd you go and do that? I thought we had a pretty good thing going on between us? Did you dislike the floating eye that much?"

I think I understood now.

So this was the man's ability.

I don't know the specifics, but it probably allows him to revive. Under special conditions, at least.

"Why aren't you answering? I thought I gave you the ability to talk?"

Necro squatted down next to my head, and put his hands on my shoulder.

His mana began to flow.

The bandages around my body began to emit a holy light that enveloped me comfortably.

A normal person would've been comforted by this light, but.

"….Geh, hyak! Hack!"

As my nerves revived, the horrid feeling of life swept towards me.

The pain that I felt was akin to having my skin burned, my intestines cracked, and my bones turn to dust–

I couldn't breath.

"How is it? Does it hurt? It hurts a lot, doesn't it? Yeah~ it probably does. See, as long as I pour in some mana, I'd be able to activate the white magic that heals people stored in these bandages."

Necro pushed down my shoulder as he continuously injected mana.

"Since these bandages are restoring a dead person's nerves, it allows you to feel pain."

I could smell rot, and taste some filth in my mouth. My blurry eyes got filled with light, and blinked out again like a broken fuse.

"Oh! Ohaha! Yah~ you seem to be in a lot of pain. Don't the burns on your body make you feel like you're burning to death right now?"

My back soared upwards into the air, daring to break itself in half.

"Since your lungs aren't normal, either, you must be suffocating as well? The pain of not being able to breath! Oh, and haven't your smell revived as well? The odor of death is quite something, isn't it? Ah, but the true icing on the cake must be your tongue. Enjoy the taste of your rotting tongue."

About three minutes.

"Well~ let's stop here."

The light faded as Necro stopped injecting mana into the bandages.

Necro tapped my shoulder lightly, and stood up with a smile.

At the same time, the restraints on my arm were taken off.

"Let's call it even, yeah? No hard feelings. After all, you killed me too, didn't you? Doesn't this put us on even grounds? Let's just… forget about the past! Start anew, you know what I mean?"

I suppose I had no choice in this matter.

"…Fine."

"Phew~ I'm glad you accepted. Right, a good person should be at least this generous. See, I was planning on torturing you untill you said yes."

Necro grinned.

"We're cool now, yeah? I don't think we can quite become BFFs at this point, but I suppose we can be friends who killed each other at one point. Ah! I'm talking too much. I forgot to introduce someone to you."

Necro tyurned around, and clapped twice.

"Oi! We're done here! You can come back in!"

As soon as Necro said this, a thick, metal door opened itself.

"Excuse me!"

The one who came in with a bright smile was the saint.

"The famed white magician, Morto Hai, is now here!"

That strange pose is… was she practicing?

"Are you alright now, Mr. Murderer?"

The saint walked closer with a smile on her face.

Morto Hai.

'Life and Death', in Latin and Hebrew.

"Mm? Your eyes are healed?"

The saint said this as she looked over my face.

Her face resembled that of a squirrel searching for food.

"You can see well now, right? As I thought, Full Bloom really does work well?"

…So it was this idiot's item?

"Hey, I'll be leaving the rest to you?"

Necro straightened out his clothes as he said this near the exit.

"Tell him about his power first. Tell him the dangers and the advantages of using it. Ah! Tell him about your power as well. Don't get eaten up like last time again."

"Pfft! You worry too much."

"In any case, take care of yourself, alright? I'll be going, then? If something happens, just contact me."

"Bye bye~"

"Sure, sure~"

The two seemed to share a relationship like an uncle and his niece.

Once Necro went outside, the saint bowed down directly above my head.

Her long hair almost threatened to tickle my nose.

"Alright then, Mr. ero ero Murderer. There's just two of us now."

She must be able to see my name using Oracle, and yet she still calls me Mr. Murderer…

Plus, that 'ero ero' prefix gets on my mind as well.

"Mn? Why aren't you saying anything? Hah! Could it be…"

The saint hugged her scanty breasts with her arms.

"I may be a beautiful girl, but please don't think perverted thoughts about me! I'll sue you!"

Beautiful girl, eh…

"Not interested."

The saint, after hearing this, covered her mouth with a gasp.

"C-could it be… Y-you… N… Necro…"

The saint balled up her fists, as if she had become deeply offended by something.

Her cheeks flushed red as she tried to say something.

A personality that would match up quite well with this person would be a funny, light-hearted one.

I thought of the type of person I'd have to act out in the future, and instead of replying to the saint's nonsense, stood up.

"I thought this the first time I saw you, but you really are quite small."

I could see a tiny head right below me.

"I wonder if I can throw you away as recyclable trash if I crush you like this?"

"Um… your inner thoughts are spilling out, it seems?"

"I said it so that you could hear it."

The saint grasped her chest with mock pain on her face.

"You were going to tell me about me power, right? Let's go seat there."

My body's condition had improved.

Even though it had hurt, the Full Bloom item's effect was to heal. The torture that Necro imposed on my body actually healed me.

"This is pretty nice, isn't it."

The saint sat down on the opposite side of me with a grin as she kept spouting nonsense.

Just what was she so happy about?

Everyone I've met so far had expressed disgust towards me.

"Stop saying nonsense, just tell me what I need to know."

"Yes, yes~ but before that."

Her voice sank.

"Can we talk about the people you've killed, Mr. Murderer?"

The saint calmly continued speaking.

"It's been six hours since you've come to this world. You've killed eight, and attempted to kill two."

The murder attempt was on Necro and the saint.

"I can't help but ask you, just what do you think of human life?"

Doesn't really matter if it's worth anything or not, does it.

"It couldn't be helped. I was commanded to kill innocents, after all."

"What about the guards, then? Did they deserve to die?"

"Of course they did. They shot their guns at me. If they began shooting, it must've meant that they were ready to face death."

"You went overboard, Mr. Murderer. With your skills, you should've had enough power to take care of all these people without killing them."

"Well, is there a reason to leave people alive, thereby putting your own life at risk?"

"If you just… regarded human life as something more precious…"

Boring.

Instead of saying my thoughts out loud, I lied faithfully.

"I'll try to do that in the future."

The saint sighed.

"…Fine, we'll end it here."

She closed her eyes, then opened them again after a short moment of thought.

"We're both busy people, you and I, so we'll start immediately. First, let's talk about the existence of power."

The saint reached for a flower pot on the table.

"Everything has a 'beginning', and every existence has a 'reason'. All living things have a Personality. There are those who wish to live, those who wish to simply survive, or those who  wish to help others."

Blue lightning arced across the saint's forehead, and created a crown of light on her head.

"The reason of existence, psychology, rules, goals… If those are what makes up your Personality,"

When the saint touched the wilted flowers, it slowly began to come back to life.

It's petals were restored, and its stalks became full of life again.

"Once your soul evolves to turn your personality into something tangible, a power is created."

A window appeared in front of me.

[Salvation = Love & Peace]

– Takes on the pain and injuries of others for yourself.

– [Lv. 1] Take on the pain and injuries of others for yourself.

– [Lv. 2] Take on the poisons and diseases of others for yourself.

– [Lv. 3] Take on the misfortunes and curses of others for yourself.

– [Lv. 4] Take on the age of others for yourself.

– [Lv. 5] Take on the death of others for yourself.

– [Lv. 6] Take on the sins of others for yourself.

"So in other words, you just slave away for other people."

"What did you say?"

The saint balled up her left hand with a kind smile.

"Nothing."

Her hands trembled as she cleared her throat.

"Let's continue. power is something that the soul creates to materialize your Personality. It's often confused with psychic powers, but psychic powers only make use of the strength of your soul. Any wizard can use it. Like this."

The saint extended her hand.

A small stream of light came out of it, and wrapped itself lightly around the flower pot.

The flower pot was then lifted up to my eye level.

If I couldn't see mana, it would've looked like the flower pot lifted by itself.

The saint put down the flower pot back onto the ground.

"Tada~!"

"……"

"Hoho~ you're a shy one, huh? But I get it. I understand your feminine shyness!"

"Shut up."

The saint just stood there dumbly in shock for a second, then grasped her chest with a loud "kuh!" once again.

"H-hnngh! That attack just now hurt quite a bit!"

The saint looked at me with a breathless face.

"Just finish explaining. So in short, power has a 'uniqueness' about it unlike psychic powers?"

"…Kuh! Correct. Each person gets one power. There are no same powers in the world, either."

"It looked like other summoned people could use their power?"

"Yes. All can use it. Ah! Of course, in this world, there are people who worked for a long time to awaken their powers. About one in a million, I think?"

The explanation just kept getting more and more ridiculous.

"Are you an idiot?"

The saint seemed to be a little confused.

[Love & Peace].

This ridiculous ability forces its user to sacrifice her life force for others.

I don't know the conditions to get it to level up, but the fact that it is level six would mean that she used it quite a bit.

Enough to earn her the title of the saint–

This idiot thought that saving other people was a normal thing to do, and must've 'saved' a countless number of people in the process.

How stupid.

To think that she'd work so hard for something as worthless as 'other people'.

"Idiot saint."

"My patience bank is about to file for bankruptcy, you know?"

The saint's peaceful face began to crack a little.

"I'll say this here and now. I am not an idiot. I am Morto Hai. Call me by that name."

The saint said this with a kind smile, and added one more thing with a glare.

"Idiot murderer."

Grrr.

Raaawr.

A predator.

This idiot was a polar opposite of me.

I couldn't accept it. I couldn't take it. I could only deny it.

Such a worldview was wrong.

The one thing that is worth the most in this world is yourself.

No one else matters more than you yourself.

If you deny this fact,

If you slowly chip away at your life due to altruism,

You might be able to save everyone, but not be able to save yourself in the end.