if you don t fall in love you ll die
Editor: Amaris
Yu Xingzhe could be said to be quite resilient to some extent.
He had a lot of ‘illnesses’ and was extremely fastidious, but those who weren’t that familiar with him had no idea about these at all.
The entire company’s top management thought that Yu Xingzhe had an incisive foresight, was resolute at decision-making, was extremely prescient, and had perfect aesthetics.
Even though these were achieved thanks to Yu Xingzhe being secretly ‘touched up’ using ‘SUN BeautyCam’, Old Yu himself already had these advantages with him.
He was fastidious, but he wouldn’t make things difficult for others; his mysophobia and neat freak tendencies had reached their terminal stages, but he wouldn’t trouble others because of them, it would just get him down.
Just like now, even though SUN had left—causing Yu Xingzhe to be so grieved as to wish he was dead—he didn’t tell anyone about it. He tried his best to endure and get used to it. Although difficult, he had firmly endured for so long.
But his endurance had reached its limit…
After all, what he had lost in his heart wasn’t a mere assistant, but someone extremely important to him. Even if Yu Xingzhe didn’t exactly know what he was feeling, the feeling of loss was true. It was tearing his nerves apart that the ‘mountain’ before his eyes seemed to be insurmountable.
Yu Xingzhe missed SUN, he missed everything about SUN.
Yu Xingzhe finally took out his cellphone and dialled SUN’s number.
SUN looked at his cellphone and answered after it rang six times.
This was exactly the right number, not too long or late, it was just right.
The moment he heard SUN’s voice, Yu Xingzhe’s eye sockets turned a little red.
SUN could see Yu Xingzhe, but he didn’t know, so he didn’t restrain himself anymore. Still, he said using a calm voice, “Could you come back?”
SUN stared at him without blinking. He finally replied using a calm voice after mulling over it for a while, “Go back to being your assistant?”
Yu Xingzhe paused.
SUN said, “Let’s meet and talk.”
Yu Xingzhe promptly agreed, “Alright.”
SUN asked, “Where are you? I’ll pick you up.”
Yu Xingzhe told him the place. Not long after, SUN arrived.
Finally being able to meet again after so long, all of Yu Xingzhe’s emotions surged up so much that he simply wanted to hug SUN tightly.
SUN only took a glance at Yu Xingzhe and said, “I’ll drive.”
Yu Xingzhe responded with a grunt, “Mn.”
SUN opened the door for him. Yu Xingzhe sat down, then SUN bent over to fasten his seatbelt.
It was really marvellous just how SUN could do everything perfectly. He was even using the most comfortable angle to fasten the seatbelt for Yu Xingzhe.
Yu Xingzhe didn’t realize it when he was already used to it. Only after he had lost him and got him back again did Yu Xingzhe deeply realize just how awesome SUN was.
Yu Xingzhe didn’t say anything, but he gradually felt better and he slowly relaxed.
The car’s temperature was just right. The song that SUN picked was fantastic. SUN drove the car very steadily. Even the angle of the seat was the best…
Yu Xingzhe, who had been exhausted for a long while, fell asleep just like that.
SUN took Yu Xingzhe back to his place.
After the car stopped steadily, Yu Xingzhe suddenly awakened. He flurriedly looked everywhere and eventually felt at ease after he saw SUN. “Sorry, I fell asleep.”
SUN said tenderly, “Let’s go. I’ll prepare a meal for you.”
Yu Xingzhe’s eyes brightened up.
SUN lived in the suburbs, in a small but beautiful house. It wasn’t wide, but it was quiet and elegant. Yu Xingzhe fell in love with it at first sight.
“This place is so beautiful.”
SUN simply smiled and took him in.
The moment they stepped in, the smart home system sensed that its owner had returned and automatically turned on the soft light. Seeing that, Yu Xingzhe couldn’t help but take a breath.
SUN asked, “Do you like it?”
Yu Xingzhe liked it so much he was going to burst soon! What are hell and heaven? There wouldn’t be any freaking harm if you don’t compare the two, alright?! What the fuck!
The entire house was designed according to Yu Xingzhe’s satisfactions, right? It practically went straight into his heart!
“This is…” Yu Xingzhe truly didn’t know what to say.
SUN’s voice was especially gentle when he said, “I designed it.”
Yu Xingzhe opened his eyes wide.
SUN looked into Yu Xingzhe, his gaze carrying the love he could not conceal anymore. “I thought of giving it to you as a new year gift.”
Yu Xingzhe tried to open his mouth, but noticed that everything he wanted to say became powerless.
It didn’t matter how much the house cost, anyone would be the same in thinking that the intention is the important thing.
No one in this world except SUN could design such a house. No other person could understand Yu Xingzhe better than SUN. Not a single human could make Yu Xingzhe this elated except SUN.
However…
SUN said, “You should sit down for now, I’ll prepare the meal.”
SUN turned around and went to the kitchen. Being left alone, Yu Xingzhe couldn’t control himself anymore, thus he revealed all of his emotions and looked around like a child. His eyes were filled with curiosity and joy, like a child getting a favorite toy. Looking at him acting like that, SUN pursed his lips into a smile.
Being able to make his beloved happy after he did something with a lot of effort gave SUN a tremendous sense of satisfaction.
SUN gave Yu Xingzhe happiness and Yu Xingzhe also did the same.
Hence, these six years seemed to pass in a blink of an eye for SUN.
No need to mention dinner, Yu Xingzhe simply wanted to weep as he ate.
So great, great, great, everything is so great! Everything feels great with SUN here!
After they were full, SUN immediately cut to the chase. “You want me to come back?”
Yu Xingzhe anxiously looked at SUN before he nodded. “Yeah.”
SUN endured himself not to soften his heart. “But I don’t want to be your assistant anymore.”
Yu Xingzhe drooped his sight, his eyelashes slightly fluttering like a butterfly wing that poked the tip of SUN’s heart.
SUN still endured. He asked, “Do you know what I mean?”
Yu Xingzhe asked back, “Do you want us to be lovers?”
SUN didn’t say anything in response.
Yu Xingzhe really didn’t want to go back to these gloomy days, thus he said in whispers, “Th…then, let’s become lovers.”
He would do anything as long as he wouldn’t lose SUN again!
SUN chuckled, his voice more charming than ever when he asked, “Do you love me?”
Yu Xingzhe’s heart skipped a beat.
SUN’s hand reached out to Yu Xingzhe, then it rested on his neck. He looked at Yu Xingzhe face to face and said earnestly, “I love you, but you don’t love me. You want to be my lover for something else…”
“Yu Xingzhe,” SUN had never spoken to him with this kind of voice for the whole six years, “haven’t you gone too far?”
Startled, Yu Xingzhe just stared blankly at SUN. Countless words were already on the tip of his tongue, yet he couldn’t manage to even get a word out.
SUN didn’t force him, however. He let go of Yu Xingzhe, then got up and said, “This house is yours. You should rest early.”
Yu Xingzhe started to speak, “You—”
SUN interrupted before he could finish his words, “Some things just couldn’t be forced.”
Yu Xingzhe sat motionlessly at where he was as he stared blankly.
That night, Yu Xingzhe couldn’t sleep soundly at all.
Everything was clearly up to his taste: the bedroom was nice, the bed was fine, even the smell of the air was his favorite.
But he couldn’t bring himself to fall into a slumber.
As Yu Xingzhe thought of SUN, he couldn’t close his eyes.
What should I do? Just what should I do to make SUN stay?
SUN had left on the next day. He had prepared breakfast, but he was gone.
Yu Xingzhe didn’t have any appetite at all and he didn’t feel like staying at home.
He truly wouldn’t have imagined that there would come a day where he couldn’t tolerate the things he loved.
With that, Yu Xingzhe went back to his house and spent a few days there while his mind was still in a whirl.
He eventually couldn’t endure anymore and gave Ye Chen a call.
Ye Chen answered in whispers, “Brother Zhe, is something the matter?” A lot of noise could be heard from his side.
After the movie had been screened, Ye Chen instantly became popular!
His role as Zhan Chen in the movie had originally been particularly charming, yet Ye Chen performed the role very nicely. The innocence and infatuation when Zhan Chen was young and the pride and affection when he had become an adult, all of them were performed brilliantly by Ye Chen. As a result, he had gained countless fans.
The actors had the looks and skills. With the addition of the top-tier marketing team, was it impossible for the movie to not be popular? Must be hallucinating.
Ye Chen became extremely busy after the movie exploded in popularity. Yu Xingzhe didn’t want to disturb him at first, but he really couldn’t bear it anymore. “Could we sit down and talk?”
The reason why Ye Chen was loved dearly by his two fathers has a lot to do with his ‘little angel’ attribute.
When they were young, no matter if it was Old Gu or Old Yu who were in a bad mood, Ye Chen would immediately notice it and tried his best to make them happy again.
Clumsy as he was, it worked pretty well.
Who wouldn’t be glad to have such a considerate friend?
Noticing the gloominess in Yu Xingzhe’s voice, Ye Chen immediately said, “Where are you? Wait for me, I’ll go there!”
Yu Xingzhe told him the location.
Ye Chen, “It’s quite close, I should be there in ten minutes.”
Yu Xingzhe responded, “Okay.”
Yu Xingzhe hung up the call. He probably hadn’t waited for ten minutes before the doorbell rang.
Ye Chen shivered the moment he went inside the house. “It’s really cold outside.”
Yu Xingzhe asked, “Why are you wearing so little clothes?”
Ye Chen replied, “I was surrounded by so many people in the morning, so my coat had wrinkles all over after being crowded. That’s why I left my coat in the car and didn’t take it with me.”
Hearing his reason, Yu Xingzhe’s heart warmed up. Taking Yu Xingzhe’s ‘illness’ into account, Ye Chen didn’t want to hurt his eyes, so he immediately took off his coat before coming in.
Yu Xingzhe said, “Immediately drink warm water now. What should you do if you catch a cold?”
Ye Chen replied, “Right, right, right, I must drink two glasses of warm water, since I won’t be able to go on a trip with Ren Jing if I catch a cold.” They had decided to go to an island for the holiday. Ren Jing would definitely be reluctant to let Ye Chen travel if he was sick and the trip would be delayed for a while then.
Yu Xingzhe had inexplicably swallowed a mouthful of dog food, but he didn’t feel sad at all and felt somewhat happy instead. His mood had surprisingly become a bit better after hearing Ye Chen’s story. Even he himself was unclear whatever the hell he was feeling.
Yu Xingzhe poured warm water for Ye Chen, then Ye Chen obediently drank two glasses and finally felt warmed up afterwards.
Yu Xingzhe couldn’t help but ‘scold’ him, “Next time, dress yourself properly before coming in. Since when have I ever been disgusted by you?”
He truly hasn’t… After all, Ye Chen had been given the green light to visit Yu Xingzhe.
Ye Chen said as he grinned, “No worries, that coat is truly too hard to explain in a few words, you’d explode when you see it.”
After Yu Xingzhe imagined it for a bit in his mind, “…”
Ye Chen immediately understood what Yu Xingzhe was thinking the moment he saw his expressions. Ye Chen changed the subject so that he wouldn’t feel unwell, “What’s the matter? Why did you look for me?”
Hearing Ye Chen’s questions, Yu Xingzhe was confused.
Contrary to what he expected, Ye Chen went straight to the center of the matter. “Have you gone to find SUN?”
Yu Xingzhe nodded.
Ye Chen asked again, “You want him to come back?”
Yu Xingzhe heaved a sigh. “He doesn’t want to become my assistant anymore.”
Of course he doesn’t, everyone could clearly see that he wants to be your lover! But certainly, Ye Chen didn’t straightforwardly say that. He must go along with the flow when dealing with a tsundere.
Ye Chen asked softly, “Do you think you truly don’t love SUN?”
Yu Xingzhe paused for a moment before finally asking the load that was on his mind, “A Chen, what does it mean to love someone?”
Ye Chen, “…”
Death System, “Old Yu needs me! Too bad I’m already bound to you.”
T/N: “HEEEEY IT’S BEEN ELEVEN (11) CHAPTERS SINCE I APPEARED SO IT’S TIME TO MAKE MY GRAND APPEARANCE!! This super stylish system is still its host’s favorite!!! Although, I’m kinda a useless system now because both my host and his husband are completely head over heels with each other now… Sigh, it ain’t easy being a system, you know!? I need to be honored, so here I am!” – Death System, probably.
Also, YEAAAAHH YU XINGZHE FINALLY REALIZING HE’S A DUMDUM AND HAD TO TAKE THIS SERIOUSLY AAAAA (Fortunately there’s Chen Chen reminding him!! Ye Chen is the true MVP in his best friends’ love life let me tell you!! Find yourself a friend like him!!!) 😭😭😭 Poor SUN bby had been waiting for six years, now is your turn you fish!! Do you even know what you’ve done these six years!? Thank god SUN is a gentleman, he’s willing to wait again and again (yeah, he’d totally get along with Ren Jing)… NOW GO U FISH, MAKE HIM HAPPY! NOW!! OR I’LL TURN YOU INTO AN UNLUCKY SALTED FISH HMPH–
CW: Mentions of death and some gloomy things, please be advised before you read.
Hi, it’s been a while since my last personal update (10 months ago iirc)~ IDK, most of my “personal” updates ended up being gloomy ones… Including this one sdfdgfsdgdfghsdfsdg. So you see, it hasn’t been a year, yet I got to witness the death of another close family member just recently. It was really sudden, no kidding. Right, my father passed away because he was contracted with COVID-19. He couldn’t be saved because there weren’t any hospitals with a spare ICU room and enough tools (?) to help him with breathing. Now, that isn’t the only problem. My mother, who took care of my father for a few days, contracted the virus as well. I’m taking care of her at the moment. And for some reason, my nephews, who are still children, ALSO contracted the virus (but my cousins are fine). No one knows whom contracted the virus to whom, but alas, since me, my mom, and my little sister could be said to only be “lodging” in my aunt’s house where my cousins and nephews also stay in, we had to shoulder all of the blame LOL. We literally wouldn’t have a place to stay anymore if not for my other uncle and auntie (yeah, I have quite a lot of relatives) who offered to take us in and suggested my mother to do self-isolation there. Really, I had no more energy to argue, but why must my aunt pull the “blaming” card now? We don’t go blaming others when we realized that my father had contracted the virus and find the solutions instead. Why still bother to blame others? I know that she’s sad that her beloved grandsons got contracted with the virus “because of my father”. BUT WE’RE ALSO THE SAME. WE’RE NOT EVEN DONE MOURNING WHEN WE FOUND OUT THAT MY MOTHER ALSO CONTRACTED THE VIRUS. I don’t want to compare, and I have no intention to do so; ALL of us are grieving right now. But why is it that instead of finding a cure and solution, we had to blame others first?
This pandemic has made the world gone chaotic enough. Please, if any of you or anyone close to you got infected with the virus, take immediate action. Confirm the symptoms with a doctor, and get yourselves checked if possible. DON’T WAIT. DON’T GET FOOLED BY FAKE NEWS. And most importantly, PLEASE FIND A SOLUTION INSTEAD OF BLAMING OTHERS. I’m begging you on my knees. I don’t want to see any more deaths with my own eyes. We can’t hold hands or hug right now, but the least we could do is to support each other from the distance. This pandemic WILL end, but only if we’re doing it together. The virus is deadly and horrifying, I know, I really do. So if by any chance any of us got contracted with it, get it treated. Follow the doctor’s recommendation so that you could recover soon. And even if death is inevitable, I’m sure there are still those who are alive. While we’re still alive, strive. Even if it seems futile. Even if it looks impossible. The least we could do in this kind of situation is to keep pushing forward.
With that said, I wouldn’t have much time online in general or to do whatever I’ve been doing until now for two weeks at least. I could never be sure of what lies ahead, but I’ll do my best to help my mom recover, so I’ll keep watch of her full-time. Don’t worry, I’ll take care of myself, too. And I’ve started retranslating a few of the earlier chapters, but I had to pause it for now. If worst comes to worst, I’ll have another translator to do it. Though, I’d still like to finish it by myself if possible. I know this is selfish of me, but please bear with me for now. I’ll be fine… I think. So yeah, see you later when the time comes~ Take care!